Bachelorette a Walk on the Wild Side

If there’s one valuable lesson to be learned in life, it’s that best friends can sometimes be your worst enemies even if they’re your BFFs.

Such is the fundamental premise of Leslye Headland’s freshman offering “Bachelorette” which is based on her well-received play of the same name.

Portly Becky (Rebel Wilson) is all set to marry the handsome but immemorable Dale and it’s up to feisty careerist Regan (Kirsten Dunst) to handle the maid of dishonor duties starting with four-alarm phone calls to high school buddies Gena (Lizzy Caplan), a smart-ass, sarcastic bohemian and Katie (Isla Fisher) a ditzy party girl.

Becky and Regan form the core of the clique but it’s only because BFF in their case means Bulimic Friends Forever.

2012 Gary Sanchez Productions, BCDF Pictures, Weinstein Company, RADiUS-TWC

Even after Becky finds out that a wasted Regan and Katie destroyed her wedding dress by trying to squeeze into it for a Facebookesque photo op, Becky can only reminisce about the times she and Regan spent in high school puking up lunch in the girls’ room.

Much raunchier than kindred chick flicks like “Bridesmaids” or anything starring Jennifer Aniston, one could probably say with fair accuracy that “Bachelorette” is more like a raunchier version of “Sex in the City” meets “The Hangover.”

The “Sex in the City” similarities go right down the principals sporting the same hair color too–two blondes, a redhead and a brunette.

Headland, better known as a TV and screen writer of the soon-to-be-released “About Last Night” and “Terriers,” a 20th Century Fox Television and FX Network co-production, pulls out all the stops in the one-liner department.

As the girls frantically search for tailor to repair Becky’s dress, Headland lets loose with zinger after zinger in a script that is tight and punchy―as in punch to the gut.

Casually relaxed pronouncements using the C-word and B-word are peppered throughout the tight 90-minute romp.

A perpetually tooted-up Gena lets her cell phone go to voicemail with a greeting that prompts the caller to “Eat a d**k.”

Katie overindulges at the reception and gradually spirals into a drug-and-drink-induced stupor.

“I don’t know what to do around people I really like, either sleep with them or get really drunk,” she relates.

After Katie overdoses on Xanax paramedics are called.

And with only minutes to spare before the wedding and no wedding dress in sight, a frazzled Regan chastises an inflexible wedding planner who notes that the cascade of mishaps aren’t on the itinerary.

“Providing a fucked up b*tch wasn’t on the itinerary either,” Regan snaps.”It’s Manhattan on Saturday ―five minutes is like 30 minutes.”

With a goofy wedding band and an eclectic soundtrack borrowing from the classics, 80s and 90s, “Bachelorette” is blisteringly uneven in parts but in a wickedly entertaining way if you can look past the vulgar language and cancer and bulimia references.—Steve Santiago

Artist entertains but Chaplin it’s not

Jean Dujardin and Bérénice Bejo star in "The Artist," 2011, The Weinstein Company

When I first saw “The Artist,” I couldn’t quite make out whether this film was a gimmicky effort made to appeal to a niche segment of cinephiles or a finely crafted homage to the silent era.

Directed by the relatively unknown Michel Hazanavicius, “Artist” (2011) has garnered glowing critical review including three Oscar nominations for Hazanavicius: best director, best original screenplay and best editing.

Despite that, “Artist” is still not in the same league as its cinematic ancestors: “The Passion of Joan of Arc” (Carl Theodor Dreyer, 1928), “The Battleship Potemkin” (Sergei M. Eisenstein, 1925), “Greed” (Erich von Stroheim, 1924), “The General” (Buster Keaton, 1926) and “Metropolis” (Fritz Lang, 1927) are just a handful of films from that era that should, at the very least, receive a special screening by the academy prior to handing out any statuette for “Artist.”

But with its legions of gushing critical followers, that seems unlikely to happen.

In any event, “Artist” opens with a screening of George Valentin’s (Jean Dujardin) latest silent picture “The Russian Affair” during which aside from him being tortured by a Frankenstein-like electrical device, not much else happens.

But after the screening, a starstruck fan, Peppy Miller (Bérénice Bejo),  accidently inserts herself into media frenzy outside the theater and is photographed planting one on Valentin’s face.

When his wife Doris (Penelope Ann Miller) sees the photo on the front page of Variety the next day, she is none too amused by both Valentin and his kooky Jack Russell Terrier, Uggie, who is trained to mimic Valentin’s pantomime.

The Weinstein Company, La Petite Reine, Studio 37

Meanwhile, Peppy Miller is ecstatic at having been photographed by Variety and decides to go on an audition at Kinograph Studios.

While waiting for her audition, she shows a butler (a bored Malcolm McDowell) the magazine cover and is dejected when he still doesn’t recognize her.

After earning a role and receiving a nod of approval from the casting director, Peppy celebrates with a Tiger Woods-like fist pump.

She then turns to a still seated McDowell and says “My name is Peppy Miller” to which McDowell wryly smiles and shrugs it off.

The Weinstein Company, La Petite Reine, Studio 37

Valentin later suggests Peppy paint a fake mole above her upper lip to attract more attention and miraculously she starts commanding better roles.

As time rolls on to 1929, sound technology comes into being and Valentin’s relationship with Doris

becomes more mundane and strained.

On top of that, Studio head Zimmer (John Goodman) screens one of the first rushes employing sound and Valentin laughs it off  as a joke.

“If that’s the future, you can have it,” he sniffs (perhaps echoing the same criticism Walt Disney received when he first proposed producing animated feature-length films).

Not surprisingly, Valentin inexplicably wakes up to an entire world using the new technology of sound only he is unable to speak, still silent and still holding on the a bygone era.

It turns out to be a Buñuelian dream from which Valentin awakens sweating and clearly disturbed― so much so that the normally outgoing actor becomes introspective on the ride to the studio at which he discovers that most of the silent actors and stage hands are gone.

Kinograph Studios has decided to halt production of silent films in favor of talkies.

“You and I belong to another era, George. The world is talking now,” Zimmerman tells a stunned Valentin.

In a matter of hours, Valentin discovers that he has gone from yesterdays box office idol to today’s washed up actor―it wasn’t possible back then to hang on for dear life by coining boorish phrases like “winning.”

Meanwhile though, Peppy Miller is winning having signed a deal with the newly reinvented Kinograph Studios.

She still believes in Valentin and eventually helps resurrect his career but only after Valentin makes one more desperate attempt at producing and acting in his own silent film which fails miserably.

The Weinstein Company 

“Artist” is an entertaining, well made and aptly researched and edited piece but the effusion of positive critique of it as something new rather than novel is puzzling and makes one wonder whether or not some critics are really familiar with the silent film canon.

Still, in addition to the categories for which it is nominated, “Artist” should probably also be nominated for best costume design, best cinematography and music score.

Everything is period correct even down to interior light switches and poster fonts.

Under ideal circumstances, there should probably be more of a push to restore original silent films and screen them at modern theaters but as they say, “every dog has its day” and if there were such a thing as an Oscar for dogs, Uggie would certainly earn my vote.―Steve Santiago

 

5 Reasons Why The Rocky Horror Picture Show Still Rocks

L-R: Patricia Quinn, Tim Curry, Nell Campbell, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, 20th Century Fox Film Corp.

For more than three decades, one film has enjoyed the longest run of any theatrical film release in U.S. history.

The home version of the video game Pong was released the same year as its initial debut and the U.S. National Film Registry recently gave it a nod as being historically significant enough to warrant preservation.

Yet simply showing up at a midnight screening makes it highly likely you’ll be pelted with rice and leave soaking wet— making this film the first (and possibly only) interactive movie.

But just how Richard O’Brien’s The Rocky Horror Picture Show went from British stage musical to cinematic sideshow to

international cultural icon is an unlikely mystery to many, but it did.

Here are a few theories as to why the RHPS is still cool today:

Fearless depiction of alternative lifestyles

The Rocky Horror Picture Show above anything else is cheeky expression of sexual freedom mixed into a cocktail of horror, sci-fi and B-movie comedy.

Riding the wave of the already in-progress sexual revolution, RHPS challenged the notion of monogamy and the institution of marriage notably when the newly engaged Brad Majors and Janet Weiss both end up being seduced by Dr. Frank-N-Furter.

It also celebrates rebellion against societal mores with an in-your-face verve that was new and that Americans, having always been a rebellious lot, naturally gravitate toward.

Nowadays, the “Sweet Transvestite” from Transsexual, Transylvania, as Dr. Frank-N-Furter is known, barely elicits a yawn but back in 1975 when RHPS was released, LGBT lifestyles were still largely unacceptable both on and off screen despite activism throughout large cities across the U.S.

The connection to pop music, art and theater

It’s often a matter of timing when art clicks on a large scale and RHPS is no exception.

One thing RHPS had going for it is that during the mid 1970s, Glam rock, Punk rock and Disco were all vying for the attention of countless fabulous nobodies packing American nightclubs and concert halls.

Whether RHPS was the vanguard or merely emulated pop culture is not as relevant as its success at tapping into the of-the-moment vibe notably in the areas of costume design, soundtrack and graphic arts.

At the time, the gender-bending S&M outfit worn by Dr. Frank-N-Furter and the striptease ensemble gracing Columbia and Magenta were considered risqué and daring.

Today, recording artists like Britney Spears and Rihanna borrow heavily from Rocky’s closet while companies like Party City routinely sell Rocky-inspired costumes on the Web.

Likewise, Riff-Raff’s austere butler uniform became the costume de rigueur for countless ghouls in movies like Phantasm (1979) and others that followed.

The garish art direction seen in RHPSshares an uncanny similarity with graphic art designs employed by groups like the Rolling Stones.

     “Some Girls,” EMI,Virgin, Rolling Stones Records

The Stones’ red lips graphic, the Warholesque packaging seen the in the Stones “Some Girls” album and the jacket of The Rocky Horror Picture Show LP bear a striking resemblance to one another.

The stage version of RHPS (which preceded the movie) was one of several rock-inspired musicals that dominated the Broadway stage back in the 1970s.

Hair, Jesus Christ Superstar and Godspell along with The Rocky Horror Show would enjoy great box office success along with later productions like the hugely successful A Chorus Line, Raisin, Dreamgirls and The Wiz.

Original soundtrack,Rhino Records

It was well cast

More than anything else, Rocky springboarded the acting careers of cast members Tim Curry, Susan Sarandon, Barry Bostwick and Meatloaf.

After his breakthrough role as Dr. Frank-N-Furter, Curry went on to play Pennywise the Dancing Clown (seemingly using the same makeup artist) in Stephen King’s It and later the less believable Dr. Petrov in The Hunt for Red October.

Sarandon’s performance as the milquetoast Janet Weiss would later seem like a practice run compared to her Oscar-winning performance in Dead Man Walking which was in stark contrast to her vamp-like roles in The Hunger, The Witches of Eastwick and Thelma & Louise.

Barry Bostwick parlayed his role as the wuss-like Brad Majors into a part in Weekend at Bernie’s II and a glut of TV roles most recently as Tim Stanwick on Fox TV’s Glee.

And before finding success from “Bat Out of Hell” (and threatening to beat the
crap out of Gary Busey on season 11 of  The Apprentice), Meatloaf  portrayed the forgettable delivery boy Eddie who (like the actor’s moniker suggests) gets served up as the main course of a dinner party hosted by Dr. Frank-N-Furter.

“Don’t be upset,” Frank-N-Furter quips. “It was a mercy killing. He had a
certain naive charm but no muscles.”

That’s what Gary Busey said.

But more importantly, she would go on to open the highly successful New York City nightclub Nell’s which was a huge hit with the model crowd during the 1990s.

It’s got a huge recyclable fan base

No other film encourages fans to bring their own props to showings like RHPS does.

Fans typically show up at the theater (whether it’s allowed or not) with rice, squirt guns, rubber gloves and confetti among other things.

Without this huge, ravenous fan base that seemingly transcends generations, RHPS would no doubt be unable to continue the long-distance run it’s enjoyed for decades.

Said supply of ravenous fans is largely supported by the innumerable fan sites found on the Web.

One such site, http://www.rockyhorror.com, recently listed some 84 venues worldwide where RHPS is screened.

With that volume of free advertising, it’s no wonder why RHPS keeps breathing long after its presumed shelf life.

It’s got memorable songs

Audiences love musicals mainly for the memorable songs that with the right luck often become American classics.

“The Sound of Music” and “My Favorite Things” from The Sound of Music immediately come to mind.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show is no different.

Songs like “The Time Warp,” “Fanfare/Don’t Dream It” and “Sweet Transvestite” put RHPS on the map and kept it there but like many musicals, it has its share of bombs that make you want to go outside for a cigarette break.

“Dammit Janet,” “Over at the Frankenstein Place” and “Planet,Schmanet, Janet” easily come to mind as songs that would like find a better reception on Sesame Street than on the silver screen.

Likewise, songs like “Eddie” have a cool 1950s rock sensibility but still don’t
seem to fit into the rest RHPS glam 1970s soundtrack.

“Time Warp” though cracked the top 50 of Billboard 200 back in 1978.

But above all the other cultural references, Rocky Horror really delivers an
accurate snapshot of what was “happening” in America back then—at
least in the big cities.

Punk, Glam, Disco and the fashion trends that come with them are all represented in RHPS.

Still, what really makes The Rocky Horror Picture Show cool is that it’s a unique experiment of sorts which encourages audience participation in a way that has never been duplicated since and probably never will.—Steve Santiago

Panic in the streets

"A Town Called Panic" 2009, La Parti Production, Made in Productions, Mélusine Productions, Beast Productions, Gebeka Films,

The past few years have witnessed a resurgence of decent stop-motion animated films that are slowly but surely reintroducing the genre to audiences who may recall classics like Art Clokey’s “Gumby” and “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” but not much else.

Not that there’s anything wrong with the iconic “Gumby” (which for decades provided hung-over college students with fodder for papers on pop culture) and “Rudolph” (really an early PSA on dealing with bullies and marginalization) but they both needed a dusting off.

Enter “Panique au Village” or “A Town Called Panic,” an out-of-competition selection screened at the 2009 Cannes Film Festival.

Directed and animated by the Belgian team of Stéphane Aubier  and Vincent Patar, the labor-intensive, French-language film clocks in at 76 minutes and utilized over 1,500 plastic toy figures over a 260-day production period.

The plot of “Panic” is relatively simple yet refreshingly twisted:

Cowboy (Coboy) and Indian (Indien) realize they forgot fellow roommate Horse’s (Cheval) birthday, so instead of buying a practical gift like a saddle, they decide to build him a barbeque grill from scratch.

When the Bert-and-Ernie-like roommates attempt to order the bricks online, they leave a coffee cup on top of the keyboard zero key and mistakenly order 50 million bricks instead of the 50 bricks the project requires.

Thus, the panic ensues—a chain of events that can only simultaneously be called absurdly surreal and knee-slapping funny.

Cowboy and Indian complete the barbeque in time to celebrate Horse’s birthday but can’t figure out what to do with the rest of the bricks so thinking Horse won’t notice, they stack the bricks on top of the house– which of course results in the whole place collapsing.

Each day they rebuild the house and each night the walls are stolen by mischievous aquatic creatures called Atlanteans who occupy a parallel universe inside a pond owned by a perpetually agitated farmer named Steven.

When the trio discover the Atlanteans stealing the walls of their house, a chase ensues during which the three heroes get chased by an angry bear, fall down a hole to the center of the earth, get trapped inside a giant snowball-throwing penguin and eventually confront the thieving sea creatures but not before escaping a school of angry barracudas.

Rounding out the frantic village people are : Jeanine (Steven’s wife), Policeman, Madame Longray (a music teacher and Horse’s love interest) and an assortment of barnyard animals.

“Panic” was originally developed as a 20-episode series for French and Belgian television in 2003 but the idea of using animated, cheap plastic toys first came to the creators during the 1980s when the directors were art students in Belgium.

By employing a frenetic, Gumbyesque editing style and what the creators describe as character vocalizations “filled with laughing gas,” “Panic” evokes a filmic quality more commonly associated with auteurs like Luis Buñel and Jean Cocteau yet it is stylistically 21st century.

And although the TV series enjoys a cult following in Europe, Shrekkies and Pixar followers across the pond may not warm up to a film like “Panic” simply because there simply is a lot crazy stuff going that does not employ a linear narrative but then again that’s where the real beauty (and fun) of this film actually lies. —Steve Santiago

With “Ghosts of Mars”, more giggles than gasps

Scene from "Ghosts of Mars" (2001) Columbia Pictures

That John Carpenter’s Ghosts of Mars is one of his least known and least appreciated films is beside the point.

Unlike Halloween, The Fog, and The Thing–all of which turned around tidy profits–Ghosts lost over $19 million after its 2001 release and was widely panned by critics despite a strong cult-like following among Carpenter fans.

And that was despite Carpenter stacking the casting deck with veterans like Natasha Henstridge, Ice Cube, Pam Grier, Jason Statham, Clea Duvall and Joanna Cassidy.

For me though, the real issue is whether or not this Carpenter flop is really a horror or a black comedy.

For one, it’s not really that scary owing mostly due to hokey makeup, a lack of decent special effects and the fact that Carpenter splattered a patch of New Mexico desert with red food dye to act as a stand in for Mars.

Two, in many places it’s downright very funny which is why I think it warrants another look.

Set in the 22nd century on a “terra-formed” Mars, Lieutenant Melanie Ballard (Henstridge) is part of a team of police officers assigned to transport a jailed Desolation Williams (Cube) and his gang back to the city to stand trial for robbery–so even in the 22nd century and on another planet, minorities are still on the run from the po-po?

To pass time on the train ride to the mining town, a bored Ballard pops a hit of a hallucinogenic drug called “clear” while also deflecting come-ons from her boss Helena Braddock (Grier).

When Braddock suggests that a quick tryst with a straight (sober) Ballard could ensure her promotion to captain, she responds, “Don’t worry Helena, I’m as straight as they come.”

Once they arrive in the deserted town, things go from bad to worse as the
possessed miners one-by-one turn Ballard’s team into sushi but not before Ballard astutely remarks,

“It’s Friday night. The whole place should be packed. A whole twelve hours before sun up and there’s money to burn, whores to ($%*#) and drugs to take.”

When the ghosts overwhelm the town, it soon becomes clear to the surviving cops that they must work with Williams (and his gang) if they are ever to get out of town alive.

While the group preps weapons to face the imminent onslaught of ghosts/miners, a member of Williams’ gang named Dos (Lobo Sebastian) demonstrates to a prostitute (Wanda De Jesus) how to open a can with a machete.

The only problem is Dos has been getting high all day on a “laugher-breather” and winds up chopping off his thumb to which Williams’ only response is to laugh and call him a “dumb ass.”

The team eventually decides that the only way to kill off the zombiesque miners is to nuke the town which, of course, results in ghostly fallout that infests the entire planet.

With Ghosts, you either love it or hate it but one thing Carpenter has going for him is that he knows how to cast a horror film. Or is it a comedy?—Steve Santiago